Your To-Do List For Success! Part 4
And I'm back! It's not over yet. I have many more suggestions for you so that you can attain that success in life that you deserve. Let's get right to it!
1) Don't Say YES Unless You Mean it!
I know it's happened to you; it's happened to most of us at one time or another. You've agreed to do something you didn't want to do because you wanted to be liked, or you thought it would make you popular, or you were scared of being rejected. There are a host of reasons why people say yes when they really want to say no. "But I'm a nice person," you say. "Of course I'd say yes to working every weekend without pay." I'm sure you're very nice, but if you're saying yes and feeling resentful, then you should have said no. Saying yes does not make you more likable. In fact, studies have shown that people who say no are more sought out and respected. People who constantly say yes out of fear, are usually seeing as doormats. I'm not trying to be mean. I just want you to value yourself. If you're doing something you don't want to do in order to be liked, you're doing it for the wrong reasons. People will like you even if you say no. Probably even more so because you are displaying self-respect. If you really want to do something, by all means do it. And if you feel really good about it, then you were right to agree. But, if you find yourself saying yes all the time, and then feeling resentful and wishing you'd never agreed to whatever, then reassess why it is you're putting yourself out there in that way. Start practicing with little No's and work your way up. Here's an example, "Hey, do you want to go see The Black Panther this weekend?" You know it's a popular movie and everyone says you must see it, but you don't like superhero movies. Say no. Pass on it. It's OK not to like what every other person likes. Stand by your decision. If you keep practicing with the little No's, you'll feel your confident start to blossom.
2) Time Passes Quickly! Use it Wisely!
We think we have time. Lots of it. The fact is that we don't. We are on borrowed time here, folks. That is the reason why the time that we do have needs to be used wisely and spent with the ones we love, doing what we love best. When the day comes for you to depart, will you have regrets? Or will you say, "Take me now! I'm so ready?" Work for no regrets. In the blink of an eye, days turn to weeks, then months, then you're singing Old Lang Syne as you cross into the New Year. It happens. We cannot take time for granted. Every minute that ticks by is precious. What do you want to do with that time? With whom do you want to spend it? These are questions to be seriously considered. The day is coming. None of us know when, but it's coming. I'm not trying to be a downer here. But have you noticed that the people who've had near misses seem to be enjoying life to its fullest? They realize the fragility of humanity. Let's not wait until we have a near miss, or an actual hit. Start living now!
3) If You Really Don't Want to Do It, It Might Be An Indication That You Should!
Are you living in fear? Passing things up, staying in your comfort zone? If so, it's time to get out of your cushy spot and doing what scares you. I remember being asked to submit a speech for my Masters graduation ceremony. I would have needed to say the speech in front of my peers and professors. Of course, I was ready to say no. I was too busy. Really? No. The truth was that I was scared shitless. I made up the "busy" excuse to convince myself not to do it. The good thing is that I was savvy enough to realize what I was doing, and accepted the invitation. I wrote my speech, and recited it in front of the "scary" crowd. Yes, I was scared, but I got through it. I came in second place, and felt like I had crossed a huge hurdle. If there's something you don't want to do, it may because you're scared, not because you don't want to do it. Ask yourself: "Why don't I want to do this?" Listen for the true answer. Doing things that scare you, such as talking in front of a group, calling someone you like and asking them out, or even trying a new ethnic food, will add another layer to who you are as a person. This is how you get unstuck from the ordinary life, and step into the extraordinary one. Say yes to different, new, scary. Watch how much you grow!